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Shopping is very popular among the majority of the population, despite their age or social standards. This is due to the fact that most people find shopping as an experience which makes a difference in their day to day life. Some people find themselves in a different world, surrounded by various material things which they may or may not be able to purchase. Even if they are not able to finance these, they find much pleasure in looking and feeling these things and Imagining owning them some day, some people go shopping when they really want to purchase things and they prefer to look around and compare the prices before buying them. I think most people love to go shopping because, then they could meet friends, make contacts with people, and get to know what is in the latest trend. It provides them a pleasant distraction from their routine and sometimes dull life.

The most important effect shopping has on an individual is that it nourishes the self-esteem. An individual may find the social contact most gratifying and this makes people come out of their shells and be more extrovert. Purchasing something, as well as knowing that you are financially able to purchase something give more self confidence to people.

The increase in popularity to go shopping has many effects on the society. People may be encouraged to go into new businesses and it will improve the economy. More job opportunities will be created for people in these businesses. Encouraged by the increase of popularity manufacturers will try to improve their products, so that the consumers can have a wide range of products at competitive prices. The overall quality of the product as well as the services provided by the sales staff will be improved.

More job opportunities will be created in advertising as the manufacturers try to sell their product. Consumers will have a better knowledge of the product. So that they will not be misleaded by inferior quality products.

I find shopping an interesting and pleasurable experience, as each year passes by, simply because it enriches my heart and mind.

words: 352

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Score & Suggestions

1. Total Score: 7.5

Task Response: 9
Coherence and Cohesion: 7
Lexical Resource: 7
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

1. Strengths and How to Maintain Them:

✅ The essay fully addresses the prompt and provides a clear and well-developed position.
✅ The ideas are relevant, extended, and well-supported with examples and explanations.
✅ The vocabulary used is varied and precise, adding depth and sophistication to the essay.

2. Top Areas for Improvement: (with Tailored Learning Materials and Examples)

Area 1: Coherence and Cohesion
- ✍️ Suggestion: Ensure that each paragraph is directly connected to the main topic and avoid repetition of phrases.
- Example: In the second paragraph, instead of shifting focus to how people go shopping, maintain a clear connection to why shopping is popular.
Area 2: Lexical Resource
- ✍️ Suggestion: Aim for more accurate and flexible use of cohesive devices to avoid repetition.
- Example: Instead of repeating phrases like "shopping is popular" and "people go shopping," try using synonyms or different sentence structures.
Area 3: Grammatical Range and Accuracy
- ✍️ Suggestion: Strive for more flexibility and accuracy in the use of complex structures.
- Example: Practice using a variety of complex sentence structures to enhance the grammatical range and accuracy of your writing.

3. Summary: Keep up the good work and focus on improving coherence, vocabulary variety, and grammar accuracy. 😊

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AI Rewritten Essay

Original Essay

Social media has been the topic of many debates and discussions recently, with many people arguing that it has a negative impact on society. While it is true that social media can lead to issues like cyberbullying and reduced face-to-face communication, it is also important to note that social media has many potential benefits.The introduction could be more focused and provide a clearer stance

One positive impact of social media is its ability to create social awareness and connect people from different parts of the world. Additionally, social media is an effective marketing tool for businesses and can be used for social causes.This paragraph lacks specific examples and depth

While it is important to be aware of the negative impacts of social media, it's also important to acknowledge the positive effects it can have. Therefore, I partially agree with the statement that social media has had a negative impact on society.This paragraph doesn't adequately address the negative impacts mentioned in the introduction

Overall, it's crucial to use social media responsibly and strike a balance between its positive and negative impacts.The conclusion is too brief and doesn't effectively summarize the main points

Improved Essay

In recent years, social media has become an integral part of our daily lives, sparking debates about its impact on society. While some argue that social media has predominantly negative effects, I believe that its influence is more nuanced, offering both challenges and opportunities. This essay will examine the potential drawbacks of social media, such as cyberbullying and decreased face-to-face interactions, as well as its benefits in terms of global connectivity and social awarenessAdded specific aspects to be discussed, ultimately arguing for a balanced perspective on its societal impact.The improved introduction provides a clearer stance and outlines the essay structure

Social media platforms have revolutionized global connectivity and social awareness. For instance, the #MeToo movement, which began on Twitter, rapidly spread awareness about sexual harassment and assault worldwide, leading to significant societal changesAdded a specific example. Moreover, these platforms enable instant communication across borders, fostering cultural exchange and understanding. From a business perspective, social media has transformed marketing strategies. Companies like Nike have leveraged platforms such as Instagram to create powerful brand narratives and engage directly with consumers, demonstrating the effectiveness of social media as a marketing toolExpanded on the business aspect with an example. Additionally, non-profit organizations have harnessed social media for fundraising and volunteer recruitment, amplifying their impact on social causes.The improved paragraph provides specific examples and more depth

Despite its benefits, social media does present significant challenges to society. Cyberbullying, for example, has become a pervasive issue, with platforms like Facebook and Twitter sometimes serving as vehicles for harassment, leading to mental health issues among users, particularly teenagersAdded specific examples of cyberbullying impacts. Moreover, the convenience of online interaction has, in some cases, led to a reduction in meaningful face-to-face communication. Studies have shown that excessive social media use can contribute to feelings of loneliness and social isolation, paradoxically diminishing real-world social skillsExpanded on the impact of reduced face-to-face communication. However, it's crucial to balance these concerns against the positive impacts previously discussed. Social media's ability to connect people globally and raise awareness about important issues can, when used responsibly, outweigh its potential drawbacks.The improved paragraph addresses both negative and positive impacts with examples

In conclusion, while social media undoubtedly poses challenges such as cyberbullying and potential social isolation, its capacity to foster global connections, raise awareness about crucial issues, and provide powerful tools for businesses and social causes cannot be overlooked. The key lies in responsible usage and digital literacy education to mitigate the negative impacts while harnessing the positive potential of these platforms. As society continues to evolve with technology, it is essential to approach social media with a balanced perspective, recognizing both its drawbacks and its capacity for positive changeAdded a call to action and final stance. Therefore, rather than viewing social media as entirely negative, we should strive to leverage its benefits while actively addressing its challenges to create a more informed and connected society.The improved conclusion summarizes the main points and provides a final perspective

Trusted evaluation

Accuracy and reliability are crucial for IELTS essay evaluations. Our AI system has undergone rigorous testing to align with IELTS band criteria, providing you with dependable results.

We conducted a benchmarking exercise comparing our tool to official IELTS grades. For this purpose, we utilized a range of sample essays from bands 4 to 9, which are available on the ielts.org website.

We evaluated each essay using UpScore.ai and compared the results to the evaluations provided by professional examiners from IELTS, which were included alongside the sample essays. The AI tool demonstrates a solid level of precision and accuracy.

In this sample of five essays, ranging from band 4 to 8.5, UpScore.ai's grading was either on par with or within a 1.5 band difference from the official score. In the majority of cases (60%), the AI score varied from the official score by no more than 0.5 band.

This underlines the tool's reliability in providing valuable and near-accurate feedback for IELTS preparation.